Another Funny Story

A drunk guy hails a cab. Once he is in the cab he offers the driver a twenty dollars to take him around the block twenty times, the taxi driver agrees. Before the driver was able to drive around the block once, the drunk says:" Can you step on it, please, i am in a hurry". 

Children Stories: The Not So Smart Mule

I remember back in the days, when I was a youngster and my mom used to read me bedtime stories. Now I tell my kids stories at their sleep time. Yesterday I told them the following story.

There was a farmer that lived in a small house in a little village along with his family. He had a big farm that he planted fruits and vegetables in, he also had two cows, few goats, a mule and a whole lot of chickens. The farmer sold the milk from his cows and goats, the eggs the chicken laid, and whatever fruits and vegetables he grew in his field for  a living. He always used his mule to carry whatever goods he wanted to sell or any goods he bought to and from the village's market on the other side of the river that separated his farm from the rest of the town.

Once the farmer bought 2 bags of 100 pounds of sugar that he loaded on the mule's back to bring them back home. While, the farmer and the mule were crossing the river, the mule tripped, its knees buckled causing the sugar bags to go under water. Most of the sugar melted in the water. The mule was so happy because his load became much lighter, but the farmer wasn't too happy about losing his sugar. Few days later, the farmer was back in the market to buy some cotton. As usual, the 2 huge cotton bags were loaded on the mule's back. Even though the bags were very big, the cotton was very light. Once in the river, the mule remembered how hid load got lighter when the sugar melted in the water, so it decided to get it's cotton load under water thinking it  was going to become lighter. But, as soon as it did that, it realized that the load became way heavier than it was because the cotton absorbed a lot of water. The mule couldn't lift it's load any longer, and it almost drowned, had it not been for the farmer's quick thinking of dropping off the load into the river.

The mule almost lost it's life in the river because of what it did, and never ever tried to do the same again since that incident.
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Kids Bed Stories

Children Stories: A Cat's Game.

 A cat was playing and having lots of fun,
when it saw a mouse close by, run.
The mouse ran much faster when it saw the cat,
that tried to catch up to it, but couldn't, cause it was kinda fat.
The mouse found a hole that was just big enough for it.
It hid inside, and hoped the cat would soon quit,
but the cat, simply, wasn't going to give up the snack,
so it waited right by the hole, ready to attack.
The mouse knew what was on the cat's mind,
while the cat was trying to get it outside.
After a good  while, the cat started to walk away,
thinking the mouse was in that hole to stay.
But, to its surprise, it saw the mouse stick out its head,
so, it turned around, and decided to stick around instead.
The cat hid in a spot the mouse couldn't see,
and jumped on it when it tried to flee.
The mouse thought it was surely going to be eaten and dead,
but the cat was a house pet, that was very well fed.
It only wanted to play with, not eat the mouse,
so when it had enough fun, it ran back in the house.
The mouse couldn't believe it was still alive,
and was back in the hole in one big dive.
Soon after, it ran away, and went back to where from it came,
thinking, it got no one else but itself to blame,
for not listening to what its mother said.
Don't go where the cats are, if you don't wanna wind up dead.

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